Sunday, December 27, 2009
Sometimes I get really depressed for no apparent reason. I seem to have been in a funk for the last day and a half or so. I think it has a lot to do with the fact that I haven't been running, and I have been way overindulging in the holiday treats, and I basically hate my body right now. But it is more than just that. I can't put my finger on exactly what it is. There are a number of things that I could blame it on....improper nutrition, lack of exercise, being unemployed, sun deprived, worried about our finances, and on and on and on. But, I don't want to be a slave to my circumstances. I want to be able to feel joy regardless of the situation. After all, isn't that one of the perks of Christianity? Aren't we supposed to rejoice in our suffering? And I can't even say that I am really suffering. I'm really not feeling much of anything and that is the problem. I'm apathetic. I don't want to be apathetic. I think I would rather be sad. I am going to work on fixing this. Tomorrow I am going to run. Three miles should help my demeanor. It should help with my general outlook. And if it doesn't, I'm going to do something else. I can't get stuck in a funk....especially when there is a lot of winter ahead of me; and it has the power to be quite depressing.