Thursday, April 15, 2010


Sometimes I just want to scream!  I can't do anything right.  I want to get in my car and just drive, without a plan, and see where God takes me.  Ninety-nine percent of the time, things are pretty good in Heather-land.  Then there is that 1% that frustrates me to no end.  It makes me want to act in ways that I know aren't healthy for me.  I have learned other ways to cope with my emotions and I don't need to resort old behaviors that were very self-destructive.  If I didn't have class tonight, I would be lacing up my running shoes and heading out to pound out some miles; take no prisoners.  it doesn't matter that I already did 5 miles this morning, I could probably run another 10 just on adrenaline right now.  But, instead I have to sit through class and take a test (which I should be studying for right now).  The bad part is that I stopped and bought a huge bag of yogurt covered pretzels and I will probably eat the entire thing during class.  Then I can really feel bad about myself.  Tomorrow's run is supposed to be another 5 miles, but I might end up busting out more than that.  I've heard you can fuel a run purely on emotion.

In reality, I know that everything will work out.  Emotions will need to be checked.  Adrenaline will have to die down.  Calm heads will prevail.  I just needed to vent.  Thanks for listening.

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